Octomom to the Rescue

Just when the daily puke-a-thon seemed like it would never end, Octomom to the rescue with the news of her nude photoshoot and porno film*. Sure the day sucked. What with...

• Europe imploding and going under
• PObama flipping to a yea on gay marriage for political purposes, not conviction
• Politics in general, Romney tetrazzini in particular
• Equities collapsing
• The miserable USA health care system for the second tier-sickies in full repose
• New Jersey being New Jersey
• Bureaucracy
• Blaaaaah!

Oh forgot - John Travolta. Poor baldie that he is. Great actor, but he got sooo middle aged. Accused of attempting to curry sexual favors with a rub-down man or two, he is likely innocent. Too late for him, in America, once sullied, a reputation is forever destroyed. Like gravy on a white wedding dress... My lord, Johnny was in NYC on the day the #1 accuser states that the actor touched his shaft - in Beverly Hills CA. Yikes! Loooong dick!

That Octomom. Remember her? First order wacko, who looks like Angelina Jolie, three poor sisters removed. Her current real name, Nadya Suleman, is not resonant. Octomom is, in that it tells all about her pregnancy and delivery of eight kids - eight, eight, eight, eight, eight, eight, eight, eig.... Undocumented, but compelling, is the rumor that she used rabbit Clomid before engaging in coitus with eight men to get eight babies. An octet for sister soul-mate... Yes, the rumors are true, well kinda...

1. She is bankrupt and houseless
2. She has 14 children by 37 men
3. She has done a nude (well topless, well nippleless) photshoot
4. She is filming a porno (well solo suzuki, masturbation only)
5. She is slated to box in Atlantic City in June, box or pillow fight or maybe even have public sex
6. She is going to buy a new house 

Somehow Octomom is a STAR. Maybe not a big star like Lindsay Lohand or Paris Whilton, but a gaseous explosive mix nonetheless. Pretty not so much, but somehow perversely cheap hooker sexy. Huh? Well look her over, whaddya think? Aw c'mon, be honest... 78% of males aged 21 and over admitted they would like to coit with her in a soon to be released study from Illinois. Her lips were thought to be beguiling. Remember it was Illinois.

The reports are in, the early ones that is. She liked doing the porn filming and she learned to pleasure herself in new ways. Hmmm. That alone is what they call a market striker. See...

Octomom Pleasure Herself in New Ways...

Buy your tickets now, chumpass(es), for the opening - scheduled for midnight June 2 at Madison Square Garden in New York City. All of the celebs of note will be there (not Spike Lee), even the ghost of Mae West. Naturally, Octomom will be present as well, signing autographs ($25) and imprinting an ink dabbed tit wherever ($20,000) for whomever has the money and intelligence required for entry.

Well, once Nadya made her news splash, well, the polarity of the American brain was reset and all of us jubes de-pissed. (Yes, Americans only have one brain. Washing of the brain can make them all the same. Like we are all identical cousins). Smells are now sweeter, sounds poetic and sights so easy on the eyes that tears are no longer needed. Indeed people of the future won't even have ducts to drain tears. Inane, stupid news is a soporific and calmer of the first order. It's 2:28 in the early morning EDT... Hmmm, what was that thing about the shaft?

Buona Notte!

nipple pictures added early AM 6-23-2012
http://www.celebjihad.com/celeb-jihad/octomom-nadya-suleman-naked-photos-released

*Octo's video is titled Home Alone and is now released. It costs $14.95 to get full access to the DVD. http://www.wicked.com/octomom?nats=MzQwMTc6MTA5OjMx,0,0,0,0