Saturday, July 31, 2010

Al Gore is Cool Again

Thank heavens. Al Gore has been exonerated. Stiff Mr. Gore was accused by a Portland masseuse of sexual harassment out of an incident which occurred in 2006. This sordid fabrication was presented earlier,

As it turns out, after a careful investigation by the Portland, Oregon authorities, the accuser Molly Hagerty was deemed to be unreliable. She failed a lie detector test and the pants, which she claimed were spoiled by Mr. Gore's enthusiasm, bore no evidence of seminal fluid. In addition, no one at the hotel remembered anything unusual about Ms. Hagerty on the night of the incident. While Ms. Hagerty said she was shaken and upset, she did not relate any problems to the hotel personnel. Moreover, she wrote a thank you note to express her gratitude for being able to work at the hotel that evening. To complicate her motives more, she was paid by the National Enquirer for her story.

Mr. Gore, who denied any wrongdoing, was cooperative and he saw this distasteful saga through to the end. The almost President, eight year Vice President, former senator and well known environmentalist has always been a person of honorable mien. Despite this incident and the fact that he and his wife, Tipper, recently announced a break up of their marriage, his reputation will remain unsullied. We, Americans, need to have some heroes.

Sadly, there's always a little dirt you can't get off the tires once they've been muddied. And for Mr. Gore, it is unfortunate that he too will still retain some of the dirt in the tread of his life. Not much, but a little. Nonetheless, it is good to have Al Gore back on the side with the guys in the white hats. Life lesson, don't get massages in hotel rooms without witnesses around. 'Nuf said.

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